Candid thoughts from a Portarlington beach house

As I write this, I am sitting curled up on a comfy armchair in the living room of our Portarlington beach house. I have no internet, just my book and access to Microsoft Word. I forgot my bag at home that had everything else I needed to take on this trip; my homework, my charging cables. While it brings me great frustration, I’ve accepted that there is nothing I can do about it. I might as well make the most of what I do have; 31% charge on my laptop and a beautiful view of the beach right outside my window.

The scene of peace I am currently experiencing is in stark contrast to the life I’ve been living these past few weeks and will be different to the next two months I have ahead of me. But like I said, I better take advantage of this opportunity before it disappears.

To paint a picture of where I’m at in this juncture, term three finished last Friday, I’m on two weeks holiday – though it’s not really a holiday because technically we are supposed to be preparing for exams.

Still, on the morning this post is released I will have left for a ChIPS camp.

Amongst all of the studying and preparing for the hectic end to year 12, I’ve thankfully been able to make time for writing blog posts and to actively participate in the Sunshine College deserves better campaign. However, these are the only things I have been able to successfully maintain consistency around.

This whole year for me has been a huge learning experience when it comes to finding balance. At the start of the year I had so many things that I wanted to achieve. Some have been successful, others have completely flown out the window. But I guess that’s life.

I regret all the events and reference committee meetings I missed at ChIPS where I lacked the ability to prove that I could be a reliable secretary. I regret that I wasn’t able to offer up my time to Miss Wendy with being in charge of uploading photos to the Dance Explosion Instagram page or writing about β€œstand-out students”. I regret that I wasn’t able to attend many social events or make an effort to catch up with more friends. I regret all the times I missed a blog post.

But what I don’t regret, is all the hours I put into doing homework and studying for VCE.

I’m a big believer in the saying that hard work pays off. If you study hard, you will see the results you deserve. Nobody ever got anything by simply wishing for it. So, when I say I don’t regret the hard work I did, I mean it. On the list of priorities, I had for this year, my VCE was number 1. At least I can say I did that… well almost.

After today, I have exactly 28 days left until year 12 exams officially begin. With the Sunshine College campaign still in full swing, I know a lot is going to happen between now and then but studying will remain a priority. On the 14thof November my last exam commences, after which I’m finally DONE!

I have much to look forward to as this year comes to a close.

As a person who is living through year 12 right now, I can tell you it’s a very confusing time and the fact that I’m such a worry wart doesn’t help at all.

I am stuck between the external pressure surrounding VCE exams and the idea that this is it. these results will determine where you end up next year and subsequently the rest of your life. And, the people who tell me to chill because exams are not as big a deal as they’re made out to be.

Perhaps the latter is truer. Perhaps there are many pathways one can take to get into the career of their dreams. But my own stubborn self doesn’t want to take any chances and I have my own aspirations of just wanting to finish school as a high so that I can prove to the world just how capable I am.

Maybe this is stupid of me. perhaps I am wasting my energy on something that is not worth it in the distant future.

But this is the thing, I can’t predict what’s going to happen to me in the future. I’m in year 12 now, so I’m doing the best I can to prepare ahead in order to give me the best chance at success. Whatever happens, I’ll let you know and if I was wrong then I will write a blog post about it.

For now, I’m sticking to my guns and I’m ready to tackle this last hurdle in the home-stretch of this year.

Good luck to all VCE students around Victoria. I’ll see you on the other side.

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Claudia Forsberg is a Melbourne based writer and journalist. She is currently working as a Regional Trainee with ABC Ballarat.

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